Thursday, October 1, 2009

My Other Daughter

Some of you, most of you, know that I have two daughters and it seems that Autumn has been getting all of the "blog-love" from me lately. So I thought I would share some spotlight with my eldest, more complicated child. Bailee is 9, about to be 10, and is beautiful. She has the blondest hair that I would have DIED for when I was a child/adolescent. She has the biggest eyes and long, perfectly curled eyelashes. And she is perfectly tall and willowy, again, something I am not. She is smart and very deep-feeling and sensitive. At times she and I don't communicate very well and that makes me sad. There are times that I feel extremely close to her and I remember how innocent and attached to me she was when she was younger. And there are times that I think I have a foreign exchange student living in my house. But she is my first-born and there is something magical about that. I am unbelievably proud of her, even if I don't always understand her. She loves to read and in that I can see a tiny glimpse of how I was at her age. And she wants so hard to succeed. She has recently found a liking to boys, which scares me and excites me. I hope we can have long talks in the future and I am ready to have hot chocolate ready when she gets her heart broken (as my mom did for me). I can't wait to see the woman she will become and the kind of mother she already looks forward to one day becoming (after college she assures me). She is so much a part of me and so many things I will never be. She is a challenge and a great investment. Her mind is NEVER quiet. In kindergarten, she had such a hard time quieting her mind and going to sleep that I made her chamomille tea at bedtime. She was my first true love.

So my bright, beautiful daughter is having a minor surgical procedure tomorrow morning and I am hoping that everything will go smoothly. Bailee has a complicated life since her father and I divorced and I just want her to be relaxed and to know how loved she is. And I can't wait to see her bat her sleepy eyelashes after the whole thing is over and done with. So then I can bring her back to her safe little room in our safe little house. After I give her whatever her heart desires to eat, of course!

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